“That erasure was the gift I gave myself.”
− Alissa Nutting
In this me-centric corner of the universe that is my blog, I have poured out my thoughts, oozing in idealisms and cynicisms that stemmed from the neurons making up my sulci and gyri. I so rarely get emotional out-of-print, and I think on this blog, I have been my most honest self. (Because of my complacency that nobody ever reads these ramblings of this particular type-happy person.)
So, in the cheesiest cliché of the world, I am writing now about the capstone lessons of my year (because there are no regrets, only lessons). 🙂
This year was all about letting go, being let down, and most importantly, coping.
Looking back on the past 360 days or so, there are moments of complete and utter clarity. Ineffable joy, juxtaposed with ineffable sadness and bitterness. These extreme emotions make some memories so unforgettable. But there are also those moments of quiet and peace that are just as crystal clear as those saturated with color or the lack thereof.
At the end of the day, or in this case, this year, usually, only memories are what are left of us. And though we rarely admit to this being the case, we can change our memories. Because memories are just how we perceive things past.
We have the choice to taint happy memories and turn them sour. As well as how we also have the choice to turn sad memories into good ones. I put the heaviest emphasis on the word choice. I totally believe that life is what we choose it to be. Ofcourse we always have to take into account that there really are things that we cannot control, but what we can control is how we react to them, and this is called coping.
We can lose things, we can lose people, we can lose people’s affection and friendship. But how we redirect our lives after losing these are what we can control. We have the choice to be depressed and wallow in sadness for the longest time. But we also have the choice to accept the things we cannot change anymore and move on to better things.
It all comes down to choice. And remember that sometimes, when things feel like they’re falling apart, maybe they’re just falling into place. 🙂